Bagel Bites Guy

At a party...

This guy is like "come play flip cup with us!"

And I'm all "sorry, can't" dodge dodge dodge the gluten

And he's like "Naw, come on!!!!"

And I'm like nope nope nope "Sorry, I can't, it's the beer."

"You...you can't drink beer?"

"Yeah, I have the gluten thing, I got some wine though, I'm set." I smiled and tilted my solo cup so he could see.  
His whole face drops.
He stands square in front of me.

He's quieter now: "The gluten thing...does that mean you can NEVER eat BAGEL BITES?!?!"

I probably wouldn't go within ten feet of a Bagel Bite even if I wasn't gluten free - but to him - a life without bagel bites was no life at all.

I nodded. "It's true. I can never eat a bagel bite.  But I can have rice and potatoes and corn and all this other stuff so it's okay." Seriously we don't even know each others' names, I appreciate your concern but I also appreciate the fact that you want to play some flip cup, so get thyself to the table! Really, I'm fine.

"But you can't have BAGEL BITES?!?!"
"Ummm...nope."

"Oh wow." He clasped his hands over his mouth. "I'm so sorry."

"It's okay! I appreciate it but it's not bad, really." Really.

 

5 things that aren't awful

It goes without saying that last week was, objectively, horrible. Bad things always seem to happen on the third week in April.  Can we just cancel it altogether and add in an extra week of summer? It's only fair, since I did have to turn the heat on yesterday...in late April...and that kind of cold is just un-American, really.

Anyway, there are a few things that weren't awful about last week, and they're listed here:

1. Taylor Swift vs. Jackson 5 Mashup

    You might really, really hate pop music. You might hate all music everywhere, and run around kicking puppies in your free time. But no matter who you are - this is addictive.  Was playing it on my phone the other day when a housemate ran in, grabbed my phone, and went, "What is this?" I was like, "Uhhh it's a phone." But she meant the song. So here it is!

2. Pad Thai
    All of it. Spicy and sweet and gluten free.  Marginally healthy, too! (The bean sprouts have to count for something, right?)  I discovered these microwaveable pad thai things at Safeway and I bring them for lunch at work at least a couple times a week.

3. Longer days
     More daylight means I've got more time after work to run errands while it's light out, instead of having to 1) scramble to get everything done before 6:30 or 2) run errands while it's dark, clinging to my pepper spray and hoping the bogeyman doesn't jump out on to the sidewalk.  I joke, but it sucks.  I can't be the only one who noticed the steep decline in campus crime emails ever since we had to "spring forward"...it's not always safe to be a woman after dark. But it's The Funnest to be a girl when it's light out and wear sundresses and run around DC with a little less worry in the back of your mind.

"Derp."

4.  Free Coffee
     Starbucks gave out free coffee last Friday!  I am not a huge coffee drinker, but I really needed some caffeine, and it ended up being a nice little office excursion.  I also discovered that Starbucks has cocoa powder that you can add to any drink.  Since I hate it when my coffee tastes like coffee, you bet I drugged that thing up with cocoa until it was...mocha.  Mocha and yummy.

5. Purple nail polish
      It's on my fingers, and it makes me happy.  Haven't even chipped it yet!  Manis never last long on me (I'm a force of destruction, I guess) but this one is a winner!
    

I'm getting excited for Georgetown Day!  How nice of them to move the keg party to nighttime to accommodate my work schedule - SUPER sweet, you guys!  And there's a faculty and staff wine tasting...it is my goal to have a wine glass in my hand at exactly 5:01 pm.  Cheers to a better week!

Announcement + Excitement!

On Saturday, after 3 cups of sangria, 2 barbecues, and 1 football game, I got a very interesting email.

It had "Huffington Post" in the subject line.

My first thought? They finally caught me, and I'm gonna get in trouble for eating 8 of the gluten-free peanut butter cups they set out in their media suite at the RNC.  

                                                                   Om nom nom.

Nope. They're not mad about that (I think). They want me to be on a panel for HuffPost TV!

It's today at 5 PM.  I am so excited!  They're going to be asking me, and other young right-wingers, about the changes we'd like to see in the Republican party.  I could talk all day about those...but I promise I won't. So...watch? :)

Here's the link!

Coulda, Woulda, Shoulda

When someone asks me if I'm a student - and I explain the situation (no, I didn't drop out of college) - they usually respond with something like this:  "Oh, you graduated early? I could have done that. I had enough credit, but I decided to blah blah blah another language blah blah blah minor in blah blah another trip abroad blah blah I'm better than you."  I am not making this up. A lot of people say this to me.

I have no idea how to react to that.  It's just not something I've ever felt the need to say to another human.  "Oh, you went skydiving? I could have done that. If I was pushed out of a plane." "Oh, you drank SO much Burnett's last night? I could have done that, but I chose not to because I have more than eleven brain cells, and would like to keep them around, thanks."

So the next time somebody says they COULD have graduated in three years - my response will be -

*ahem*

"Yeah. BUT YOU DIDN'T."

Saturday Night

Saturday night was certainly one of the more...interesting...nights I've experienced.  I can't give the details of exactly what happened, but I can give bits and pieces. So.

2 - the number of black escalades
1796 - the year the restaurant was built
1, 2, 3, and 40 - the numbers of the U.S. presidents it has hosted (Washington, Adams, Jefferson, and Reagan)
9 - people at dinner
2 - of them spoke no English
3 - have PhDs
7 - the age of two other participants (not the ones with PhDs...)
1 - Ex-policeman from a country where the police and the military are kind of the same thing

 

The original hardwoods from 1796...sorry it's sideways!

 Car #2.

Who Should We Hate Next?

If there is one thing Georgetowners hate, it's Lauinger Library Syracuse. This rivalry is older than most current students. And as we gear up to the last game for the next few years at least, Cuse rage is at an all-time high.

But where is that rage gonna go after we (hopefully) send them packing back to NY on Saturday? We can't let all that hate float around freely. We also can't all hate different things, because nothing creates bonding like hating the same thing. Look at how New York hates Boston, or how literally every woman in America hates Anne Hathaway. (Side note: why did we all decide to hate Anne Hathaway now?) Anyway, the harmless pop-culture version of "hate" really does bring. people together.

All of this begs the question: Who should we hate next? Ranking the schools in the "Catholic Seven," here's the scorecard for best potential rival:

Depaul
Pros: Their mascot is the Blue Demon. It makes sense that a Catholic school would root against them (oh, the exorcist references to be made!) Also similar to Georgetown in regards to history and as a research institution.
Cons: None of that actually matters in a sports rivalry, and their basketball team kinda sucks.

Marquette
Pros: Todd Mayo. If the kid keeps his grades up and doesn't lose NCAA eligibility again (judgemental laughter goes here), he could really make Marquette a very competitive team.
Cons: There is nothing intimidating about a guy named Todd. Todd is Chad's less-fratty, less fun older brother.

Pictured: Someone named Todd, probably.

St. Johns
Pros: Same home state as Syracuse? That's all I got for this one.
Cons: Come on, we can't hate a school named after a saint! But we can say that it wouldn't be a very contentious rivalry. Next!

Providence
Pros: Dominicans.
Cons: Dominicans. I have a hard enough time explaining to friends from home what a Jesuit is, so I don't know if many basketball fans would understand the whole Dominican / Jesuit / Franciscan thing.

Seton Hall
Pros: It's in New Jersey, and I find it pretty easy to mock and/or hate most things from that state.
Cons: One of the worst teams in the Big East. And it's a TINY school, so, limited number of fans means limited opportunities to tell them that we're better than them.

Villanova
Pros: We already have the nickname, VILLANOFUN. Plus - their mascot is a cat, ours is a dog. And they typically have a pretty good basketball team.
Cons: They're kind of...vanilla. Vanillanova? The only think we could mock them for is that students are stereotypically wealthy, Northeastern, and preppy.  Pot, kettle.

New Englanders don't trash talk. They just do this.

It looks like Villanova is our best bet for an in-conference rivalry, with Marquette being second and perhaps DePaul or Providence in third. In the meantime - let's squeeze (the orange!) and also all the good old-fashioned sports hate we can into the next few days. Because when Syracuse loses, America wins.

I've got to get started on this new project at work. It's got a million little steps and has no end date...so I've been procrastinating. But! No more.

I've figured out a solution:

Bribery.

For every time I do part of the project, I get to eat a cookie.

Today is baking day. I have a recipe for healthy ones that I really like, and tupperware at the ready.

And if you're wondering what's to stop me from eating a cookie regardless of where I'm at on the project - well, I'm pretty used to having to say no to baked goods.

They say it takes 21 days to create a new habit...here goes!