Ann Coulter!

I got to see Ann Coulter tonight.  Before, I thought she was pretty smart and all, but now, she is my snarky blonde idol.  She was brilliant.

In her words:

On liberal groupthink and obsessive need to be included:  "Appeals to status work very well on liberals."

On television programming:  "MSNBC's Lardball"

On how the government tries to fix issues with government spending by, you guessed it, even MORE government spending:  "It's like trying to sober up by having another drink - except that's fun!"  Mind you, she said this in a room full of college students- homegirl knows her audience!


On health care:  "You want health insurance is in case of a catastrophe- like if you get sick, or injured, or accidentally marry a Kardashian."

Gratuitous sass: "Obama has surpassed Tiger Woods' record for most apologies by a mixed race male."

Gonna be honest, I expected her to have an Adam's Apple.  Some of what's out there in the press about her is just nasty- and not only does she have a 100% normal woman neck, she is stunning!  In her forties, she is in better shape than most college kids.  But of course there are folks out there who refuse to let any American media consumer to think she is anything but a freak.  Liberals were pro-woman until they met a smart, pretty, conservative woman- YOU GO GIRL!


There were some people in the audience who raised legitimate criticism of her work during the question and answer portion.  But unfortunately, those polite dissidents were the minority.  Every whiny look-at-sad-victimized-me-liberal trotted out in rare form to give Ann a piece of their minds.

She did all but unhinge her jaw and swallow them whole.

She could tell when a dweeb had gotten his talking points from a hate speech website (and yes, there are liberal hate speech websites).  She called people out when their "questions" were more along the lines of angry, ungrounded statements.


There was one girl who showed up with her hair falling all in her face, rocking an Obama t-shirt a size too small, in booty jorts and Uggs.  Of course, she asks some stupid question that lacked substance...methinks somebody just wanted to get people to look at her.  Anyhow, it worked- I gave that little snot so much side-eye my face is gonna hurt tomorrow.  I mean...booty jorts.  Really, honey?  You thought those were a good idea to wear to a speech in mid-October, where you would stand in front of 400 people and try to look smart by asking a question?


Also on my shit list:  The guy and gal next to me who made quite a team.  He tried snapping at me about how Bush and the Republicans are to be blamed for All The Bad Things, and when I SCHOOLED HIM - not really a Bush fan to be honest but definitely a truth fan- and smiled the whole time, she would make him feel better by mocking me and my accent.  Bless your heart, forgetting that smiley little Southern girls can be just as smart as you.  We may have lost the war but HOT DAMN I won that battle...just sayin.


So, Ann Coulter, you are a BOSS.  Thank you for showing every college liberal whacko how it's done.  I am hoping her style is contagious- the world needs more Ann Coulters, and I'm hoping some of them were in the room to hear her speak tonight.